RIPPEMOFF, SUKMDRY and BUBBA

This week's Cranky re-run is from September 2011

Law firms advertise on TV to drum up business. Lately I have been seeing ads that are looking for people that have been injured from prescription drugs. Almost any drug taken incorrectly or in conjunction with another drug can be harmful. Almost all drugs can have negative effects on different people and need to be monitored. Some drugs just have not been properly tested and even though FDA approved the drug, companies should probably absorb some liability.

Apparently law firms also have some liability. If they advertize that a specific drug might be harmful, and a patient stops taking the medicine which could be saving his life, the law firm may be held liable.

This is why the latest law firm commercial I heard contains a disclaimer:

“If you take Factrose for diabetes even for a short time, you could get kidney cancer. If you took factrose and suffer kidney cancer or any other illness, contact Rippemoff, Sukmdry and Bubba. You may be eligible for large monetary compensation. Do not stop taking Factrose without first speaking to your doctor.”

So…..this drug is dangerous even if taken for a short period of time…..so…. we may be able to sue the drug company, your doctor, or both…..but check with your doctor first. Yes, we here at Rippemoff, Sukmdry and Bubba are warning you not to take this drug, unless it works, then we do not want to be liable for warning you about it being dangerous.

Wha wha WHAT? I should check with the doctor who may be prescribing a dangerous drug?

“Excuse me Doc, but my lawyer says Factrose may cause kidney cancer. Should I still take it?”

What is your doctor going to say?

“Heck no! Stop taking it and when you go into a diabetic coma ask your freaking lawyer to prescribe something!”
The drug companies warn you of multiple reactions from cancer to suicide to acne if you take their drug which may save your life.

“If you are suffering from diabetes, ask your doctor about Factrose to control your blood sugar. In a small percentage of patients Factrose may cause acne, boils, thoughts of suicide or death. If you suffer from acne, boils, or thoughts of suicide call your doctor. If you die while taking Factrose, have someone call the mortuary.”

The lawyers are ready to sue anyone if the drug so much as gives you the sniffles but they also tell you to check with the same doctor who is prescribing the dangerous drug before you stop taking it. Everyone is trying to cover their butt to avoid all liability.

One of the things wrong with our healthcare system is that decisions for treatment are made with lawyers circling overhead. Potential liability, valid or not, sometimes trumps the best treatment, and disclaimers scare the BeJesus out of patients.

If there is such a thing as psychosomatic illness, between the drug company disclaimers and lawyer’s advertisements, today’s patients do not stand a chance.